curb check

you are in the forefront of my mind.  are you aware of this?  do you know it?  do you care?  some people classify you as my friend.  others do not know you even exist.  i, true to form, could care less what others think of you and am much more concerned with what YOU think of yourself.

as you read this you probably wonder who this is addressing.  who am i talking to?  it is addressing you!   do you know that?  do you care?  do you see the goodness in yourself?  i see it.  i see it every day.  i am aware of it as i watch how you treat others.  kindness is a choice you make.  i cannot verify how many years you have been this way but for as long as i have known you, you have been nice.

and look at the way you interact with those clamoring to be around you.  people flock to you.  i understand the draw.  they are like a moth to the flame.  people want a piece of you.  how much can you give before you loose yourself to the masses? 

i watch from the sidelines and wonder what keeps you grounded.  is it the importance of the notoriety that keeps you propelling forward?  do you tire?  do you seek rest? do you seek solitude?  why do you keep the pace you keep?  do you care about the acquaintances that care about you?   how much do you really know about them?  do they really matter?

you see, each one of us floats through this thing called life making a HUGE impression on others we have no clue are even watching.  might i suggest you treat your important stuff really important.  and the medium important stuff - give it some attention but not the good stuff.  save the good stuff for the really important/good stuff.  and the not so important - give it a nod and move on.

i recognize you have years of practice being everything to everyone.  many rely on you.  you are the mother, the father, the peacemaker, the conflict resolution master and everything else.  but trust me, it doesn't have to be that way...you are the captain(esse) of your ship and it is past time for you to act like it.  this is far less about you liking the chores in front of you and more about putting your head down and getting through it!  you have no idea what is waiting for you on the other side - but i have a strong feeling you are going to like it.  a lot.  it will be rare.  and familiar all at the same time.

might i be so bold as to tell you not to miss the ride!  the bus comes around every 30 minutes and the ride is cheap...but one of these days the stairs are going to be too steep for you to climb and once you do get to the top -the view is going to be way different. 

choose wisely my friend.