risky business

i am a mighty risk taker.  i am not true to myself if i do not take risks.  it is the way i am hard wired.  i am a deep thinker and that often leads to uncharted waters.  i can pretend that the paved, worn path is the path i prefer, but that is simply not true.  i like the risk.  the rewards are great. i have not met anyone who has been able to travel with me for the entire journey and quite frankly sometimes it gets lonely. 

on the other hand - i have many people who step on to the path with me as their time allows.  they walk or run along with me until their responsibilities call them away.  others never step on the path but stand on the sidelines cheering me on.  they are important to me as well.  there are even some who stand by with their arms crossed in disbelief or disgust - and that is ok too.   they propel me forward because i do not give up - and if i were to start to give up i simply remember the naysayers and am determined to prove them wrong.

you see, i do not take the risks for any one's approval.  it is not that i don't care what others think - i just do not care what they think of me.  i can not imagine the number of lessons that i would not have learned if i would not have risked.

so as i venture out on this next trek i go with the knowledge that there are some of you who think i am irresponsible, a buhhdist, a warrior, a strong woman, a friend, a wise woman, a derelict, a rebel, a mess or any other sundry of descriptions...and that is fine by me.  because as lonely as i sometimes feel i know i am not alone and at the very end of my journey the truth will come out.